Oh does this ever take me back. I came out, if you could call it that in the early 1980’s. I was desperate for sex. My college years were very frustrating. I was really for “the act”. But underneath that, I was starved for love.
What I got was older men in dirty bookstores that wanted me to make them have a happy ending. They were not “relationship material” because if they had been, they would have been in a relationship.
So each time I had sex, even though it was in a “dirty bookstore”, I would give a bit of my heart. It was painful!!!
And I was 23 plus when this was going on. Fortunately I just kept to my self until 23, but I wasn’t much better off for it in the long run.
I like your advice in this article but have to also remember that self-esteem gets into play as well. If I had had some, maybe I wouldn’t have taken the route I did…and let myself basically be used as a dumping ground for the libelo of all the straight and/or gay men that wanted to “just get off”.
But then being raised in a fundamentalist home where I was basically taught that I was somehow “no good” didn’t help with that.